Archives: Jokes

Speaking of Which…

March 18, 2021 | By pkelley | Comments Off on Speaking of Which… | Filed in: Jokes 4 Meetings.

Basketball: The sport of choice for Urbanites. Bowling: The sport of choice for Blue Collar folk. Football: The sport of choice for meat-heads and those with no necks… Baseball: The sport of choice for lower management. Tennis: The sport of choice for middle management. Golf: The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers. And, • Read More »

Uncle Josh Secret To Longevity

March 18, 2021 | By pkelley | Comments Off on Uncle Josh Secret To Longevity | Filed in: Jokes 4 Meetings.

Uncle Josh lifed to a ripe old age of 97. My favorite uncle.  He was a rough and tumble sort of guy. Hunter,fisherman all around outdoormans. I asked him once what did he attribute to his long lifespan. “How did you do it unk?” He responded, “When I was 12 years old, my father took • Read More »

One-Liners on Aging

March 18, 2021 | By pkelley | Comments Off on One-Liners on Aging | Filed in: Jokes 4 Meetings.

Q: How can you speed up the heart rate of your elderly spouse? A: Tell him you’re pregnant. Q: How can you avoid getting wrinkles? A: Remove your eye glasses. Q: Females: How to rid yourself of crow’s feet and face wrinkles? A: Go bra less, the weight will stretch those wrinkles right out. Q: • Read More »

Train Engineer Bob

September 22, 2020 | By pkelley | Comments Off on Train Engineer Bob | Filed in: Betty & Bob.

Bob. the train engineer loved his job. Driving trains had been his life long dream since childhood. Bob loved to make his train go fast so ultimately, one day he got reckless and caused a crash which killed a person and caused immense property damage. Needless to say, he went to court over the train • Read More »

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Bob and Neighborhood Bullies

September 22, 2020 | By pkelley | Comments Off on Bob and Neighborhood Bullies | Filed in: Betty & Bob.

Every day Bobby was teased by neighborhood bullies. Their favorite joke was to offer Bobby a choice between one dime or one nickle. Bobby always chose the nickle and the bullies would laugh hysterically, call Bobby a dummy, then ride off on their bicycles. One day Betty witnessed the cruel teasing. She took Bobby aside • Read More »

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The Duck and Bartender Bob

September 22, 2020 | By pkelley | Comments Off on The Duck and Bartender Bob | Filed in: Betty & Bob.

A duck walks into a bar and asks bartender Bob, “Got any grapes?” Bartender Bob, confused, tells the duck, “This is a bar. We serve booze to humans. Get the heck out of here.” The duck thanks him and waddles out the door. The next day, the duck returns, jumps on the barstool and asks, • Read More »

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Einstein and Bob

September 22, 2020 | By pkelley | Comments Off on Einstein and Bob | Filed in: Betty & Bob.

One day, while Bob was driving his taxi, he was surprised to see Einstein jump into his cab and announce that he is to speak at an important science conference located downtown. On the way there, Einstein remarks “Say, I notice that you look a lot like me.” Bob looks at himself in his rear • Read More »

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Bob and the Big Parrot

September 22, 2020 | By pkelley | Comments Off on Bob and the Big Parrot | Filed in: Betty & Bob.

Bob spied a big green parrot in a pet shop window under a big sign that said “A Great Talker!” Bob walked in the shop and asked the merchant “How much for the talking bird? “Well,” replied the merchant, “Since he’s such a good talker, I can’t let him go for less than $100.” “Hmm,” • Read More »

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Bob Meets Capt’n Black Peg

September 22, 2020 | By pkelley | Comments Off on Bob Meets Capt’n Black Peg | Filed in: Betty & Bob.

Pirate Day Joke: Bob decides to quit his job and join a pirate’s crew aboard the Black Star. Ships captain, Capt’n Black Peg, was a fearsome-looking pirate who sported a peg leg, one hooked hand and raggedy black eye patch. After a few days on the ship, Bob approached Capt’n Black Peg, “Captain,” he asks, • Read More »

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